Teacher, Can You Help Me? 

I Think I Am a Little Bit Confused!

By Robert Breaker III

 young man packs his bags

And off to Bible School he goes,

Thinking he'll learn all he lacks,

And soon the Bible he will know

The Professors are all "doctors"

And love to be called such,

But he soon learns that Proctors

Don't amount to much.

The teacher begins to teach him Greek,

Telling him God's words are all true,

But then with a forked tongue he creaks,

"But that old King James is bull!"

While dazed, disturbed, and confused,

The student cannot comprehend,

How his Professor can continually ruse

And belittle his precious old "archaic" Bible without end.

Finally he raises his hand,

For he feels that he must speak,

So many questions cloud his mind,

Answer's are what he seeks.

"Teacher can you help me?

I'm just a little bit confused,

You taught me for God's word to be,

It must come from the Greek Text you use.

But what of the 'Recived Text?'

Was it not of the Majority?

And about that LXX

It's not in Hebrew, but in Greek, I believe!

You taught me not to be Catholic,

And you put Erasmus down for being so

While you defend the aleph text,

By saying it's best because it is old.

But I thought it was in the Vatican,

Where they found that "older" text.

And wasn't it in the garbage can,

Where Tishendorf found his codex?

And what about the scriptures,

And where to be found might they be?

You told me they were God's own 'scattered words,'

And only found in your library.

I heard you point and say, 'The Bible is God's word!'

While you held a KJV in your hand,

But then I heard you call it 'absurd,'

For that book to take a stand.

You taught me that the scriptures were inspired,

But only "original autographs,"

But when I asked where they were,

I found that them, no one has.

When I asked you where your Bible was,

You pointed to your shelf

With a hand waving fast,

You told me, "These and me myself."

I soon began to learn something

Of which I didn't know before.

You have no Bible, Mr. Dingaling

And all final authority is yours!

From your class I gathered,

'The Bible contains mistakes!

We use the King James

But to believe it, that takes faith.'

I left your school not knowing much

Probably less than I did before

For when I left home I had a Bible,

And now I don't know anymore."